Don't Make My Blood Go Upstairs

Hai adik-adik!

Hari nie Kak shikin dan Abang Heri nak story siket pasal aku nyer fren yang berbangsa asing. *Bangsa asing kaper!* Sebab tu lah sayer berbahasa ibunda pada malam ini. Jangan risau, ini bukan angkara demam panas.

Reason kenape aku tibe-tibe nak bebual pasal kawan aku yang satu nie... Ye lah, dia ni bukan nye popular sangat ke, to be honest memang takde bende yang interesting lah sangat nak diketengahkan pasal Minah Songsang ni.

Karena (ewah...) aku dah naik bingit ngan dia nye perangai ar. Dah nak dekat dua tahun aku sabar. Nak tau kenape? Si pistol plastik nie tak habes2 suke tanye aku soalan yang tak hebat dan bodoh sey.

Macam tadi petang, aku adelar excited nak balik (yelah sebelum peak hour jadi lagi terok kan) abeh saudari berkenan lepak to the max mintak aku temankan pegi building CCA die pasal dia tak tau macamane nak gi sana.

Part ni, mulot aku yang dah sememangnye ternganga MAKIN lah ternganga besar-besar.

Building tu dekat giler ngan building skola kitorang. Kurang dari 7 minit of jalan jek dah boleh sampai. Abeh tu kiter dah lalu sane berjuta-juta kali dah. Takkan masih tak tau ehk? Unless dia nie ngade2 nak hint aku sroh teman macam selalu tak? Rilek sua gerl, klau sehaluan ngan tempat aku nak jalan takpe jugak. Guwa part gini malas nak patah-patah balik.

Adik aku sroh teman gi toilet jek aku da reject. Melampau sungguh permintaan Cik Pistol kite nie. This is not the first time tau.

So, aku pon cakap dengan dia baik-baik (darah dah menyirap dengan kebodohannya tapi masih boleh dikontrol):

"Aik kau biar betol tak tau? Building tu kan kau turon lift pastu jalan jek belakang. Ikut direction nak pegi canteen blabla...dari sana kau dah boleh nampak building tu depan mate per."

Of course, aku bual in english lar.

Si pompan nie lagi boleh tanye aku jalan mane lah, dengan muke blur dia. Padahal aku boleh confirm plus stamp of approval that she jolly well know the place. Part tu aku serious anytime jek boleh tampal handprint aku dekat pipi die. Tinggal tunggu timing betul jek. Explain punye explain, baru lah info siket2 masok pat pale otak dia tu.

Ade banyak lagi soalan-soalan bodoh yang dia pernah tanye aku. Macam ape number handphone bapak dier.. Dia patot beli chicken rice ke tidak..Boleh tak aku buat kan semua assignments dia (kiwak giler ke??! tebal siol kulit).. dan lain-lain.

Sampai kan the whole way dalam bus nak balik, aku macam pasrah ar gitu.

Aku tak faham uh. Dia buat-buat bodoh ke memang bengap mentega?? Orang-orang macam tu memang exist eh? Please tell me it isn't true. Kenape? Kenape? Dan, kenape?

Dulu aku had enough pastu komplen pasal nie pat kawan aku yang lagi pandai (hahaha). Dia kes tak kesah kalau dia bitchy ke, sarcastic ke. Dia naik hairan kenape aku nie tak pernah nak gertak prangai si pompan biol nie and kenape aku baik sangat. AHEM!

I repeat, aku baik sangat. Wakakaka!

Ntah eh, aku pun tak tau kenape aku baik sangat.. Pasal aku taknak jadi kurangajar tak?

Hmm make sense jugak.

For me I don't have the rights to treat people badly. Walau macam mane irritating pon dier tu, dia pernah tolong aku jugak and she's still a friend to me right? Cume...dia tu LEMBAB NAK MAMPOS jek!! Wakakaka!

Ntahlah, kadang-kadang terlalu baik pon orang naik lemak lalu mereka dengan tanpa segan silu pijak-pijak kepale kiter macam kain lap kaki.

Ape yang aku tau, nasib ni pompan ade kawan yang masih on boleh bersabar siak. Kalau orang lain, dah lame dia kene seret gi toilet, dirembat secare beramai-ramai pastu amik video den upload pat YouTube.

Pranks Makes The World Go Round~!

Today was okay, I skipped morning lesson again. Like always if Mum still find me in bed after 8, she will question me in my sleep and I will mumble back to her,"afternoon class lar mak".

Afternoon class was boring, but the best part is I hid Madeleine's shoe and bag away and pushed the blame to my clueless lecturer.

The better part is when she actually believed that shit and had no idea the lecturer was framed.

The awesomest part of it was, I think she still does!

HAHAHA!

It's a bird! It's a plane! Oh..it's him again.YAWN!

On wednesdays, there is...

...no school and I didn't request for any shifts. The procrastinator in me need to try and complete the piling workload all in a day.

There is this guy in my poly who were also formerly in the same secondary school as me. Even though I don't really know him, I already hate his guts from the start.

I used to be in the same CCA as him but since my involvement has gone to a complete stop, I thought I'll never have to see that person again.

But what I'm certainly sure of, I kept seeing his fuckface around in school and outside school compound ALOT these few weeks.

Dude, you're freaking everywhere!! Do you have your own portable milky way or something you hide in that perfect pocket of yours? DAMN!

I haven't even seen my other neighbour for close to a year. And he lives just one storey down! Really man, how the hell did he do that? His Mr I'm-All-That..Urghh!

At the canteen, makan place, MacDonald's and even on my way to the bustop, he's there with his swagger. What the fuck man.

And to think that I never bumped into the people who I actually prefer to meet.

p.s, My nikes' gone. ='(

Speed Demon

If yesterday's post was about buses, today's entry is all about cars.

HEHEHEHEK!! *cheeky giggle*

My weekends are as boring as it could be; the perspective of having to work.

BUT after that, at home I was greeted by a new cd playing on the tube (should be my sister's piracy impulse again). Guess what, it is one of my favourite-st cerita katun of all time, Cars!

So I plopped onto my couch and watch halfway through, until I dozed off. Kesian penat dier..Nothing's unusual right.

Sidetrack:

This goes out to my dad,

Even though I'm half-asleep, don't think I forget that "somebody" tried to stuff some chicken roll into my mouth. Watch ur back old man.

It was usual till up to a point where I dreamt that I drove a race car! In my living room! Cmon who dreams that every day? Dreaming about flying and ol that shit are so yesterday. Hahah! And I remembered every detail of it, from me revving the engine in awe and crashing happily into my tv set coz I forgot to press the brakes! I love to dream, they're all crayzay yall! Seriously as sad as it might sound, I felt so delighted because that dream is about the closest real thing I felt in driving a race car. But of kors, it's still just a dream. :(

So u all now know what to buy for my birthday eh? Tak payah mahal-mahal, beli chilli crab jek cukop.

Ceh, Chilli crab kaper! No link, but still delicious.

But, the most embarrassing and ridiculous experience I had was the time when I dreamt that Mira just keeps talking to me non-stop till I got so frustrated I shouted for her to shut up, for reals! Hahahah! Habes! Malu siak daku. I woke up, shocked, looked around to see if anyone heard. And after confirming that no one did, I pretended to sleep. Kiwak paiseh giler sey. :p

I'm gonna watch Cars again later and hopefully get that exhilarating dream again. Yeehaa!

Bus? Public transport? No thank you, I'll rather travel round this island with my tricycle.

Let me introduce maself.

I work part-time, just like everybody else who does.

I'm in poly, like thousands other students.

And I use bus concession, like any other legit bus users.

But today, I took 2 and a half hours to travel back home from town.

I have a feeling that I'm alone in this.

Never in such a long time am I this agitated and pushed far to the fucking limit, just to wait for a bus.

WATAFUCK!!! Betol2 dah spark aku nyer wire tau nie bus jahanam..masa berjalan siak. Besok kene keje pagi pulak tu. Jangan kate Johor, masok Batam pon lagy cepat siol!!!

I'm not whining but serious ok, some of these public transportations..How many times have you seen other buses of the same service-number arriving in twos (or more best, threes) at the same shot? During less peak hours sumore. And your fuckin bus was still nowhere to be seen after like what, 20-30 mins??. Mate korang merah tak?! My hair's gonna turn white sooner or later because of this.

And the lady whose in the same boat as me at that damned bus stand for the whole thirty minutes even began to start a bitching session with me, which I think is jagillion times way better than waiting for the goddamn sonofabitch!

I have to wait another 30 minutes for another bus to get home.. Tu pon lepas aku gerak ke bus stop depan untok amek bus lain. Klau nak diri sana tunggu bus yang aku nak naik initially, nampak nyer either 1. aku tak sampai-sampai rumah or, 2. badan aku end up jadi jeruk.

On the brighter side, at least now I know why I took up car license in the first place. Bagos, bakar kan lagy semangat aku!

HEY HO, LET'S GO!

Woo! It's been awhile since I last updated something worth reading! Wakakaka! I, ma dear friends, are uninspired to the max. Aight, just wanna come in here and update you guys that, I got a sudden cold (selsema rabak) and almost choked on my mucus just now. UHUKK!

Alright that's all. Till next time baybeh..

just kidding dudes. There's more.

Anyways, this evening I was in the bus with these three masscom students and they were friggin annoying siak. Freshmen and planning to go clubbing sumore at st james under student entry in their blogshop tube dress, fake eyelashes and button down shirt(the shirt is for the only guy in that threesome clan).

K I made the dressings and lashes stuff up. Well, how I know these in such details? Coz I join sekaki into their conversation lar, what else! Ceh no lah.. They're literally speaking out to each and every commuters in the vehicle. We can even hear their breaths, I think.

Can you imagine bloggie, how tempted am I to fart some watery gas at their faces?

Kalau nak bual pon, aku tak pasal lar. Nie public bus bukan library, aku tau. Tapi jangan lar sampai sumer gossip dan slang mrepek diorang aku bleh dengar. Nanti aku kutok2 dalam hati, yours truly jugak yang dapat dosa kan. Kesian lar cket, saye blom khatam al-quran tau.

*Change of topic*

Anyways when I was a kid, I was the last child for seven years. I got bored so I wished for a baby sister. And well ya know what, on 1st November 1998, I got that wish.

I clearly remembered dad coming out from this room and told me,"Kin, you've got a sister!"

kata abahku sambil menari keroncong dengan salah satu nurse pat sane..Hahaha! I'm just kidding ok, mati siak kalau mak aku terbace.

I was so goddamn happy back then coz babies are globally known as cute and cuddly. We're runnin around the dark corridors of the hospital on Halloween night. And I thought, oh goody..me and my lil sister will be the chummiest best playmates in this family ever.

Well, zoom 11 years later, here we are. She turned eleven..a bitchy age, my day won't pass without bullying that fat arse, and gues what..we're far from the word: chummy.

To tell you the truth, that donkey almost strip me nude yesterday when she pulled down my shorts in the living room. And my second sister witnessed everything. Gee, thanks for visually raping my ass.

We celebrated her birthday last Saturday at Sakura buffet and a movie (THIS IS IT!!), and ending the day with ice cream cake. Kite makan macam besok nak pegy perang siak...

My gorgeous mom..with her classic pose.

My gorgeous mom..with her classic kid.

Two missing.

WARNING!!! skip the following picture if you have a weak tummy!

Aaaah!

This is it is the most celebrative music documentary feature film of all time. And I'm not saying just coz I'm a huge MJ fan. Ok, maybe a lil bit. Huahuahua..

She's eating so fast her chopsticks went blurry.

I was so full I can't even finish this small portion of ice cream. (slalu nyer aku boleh habis kan satu tub)

At Home, obviously.

Aite, I gotta clear my nose now..

How am I doing?

I'm doing THIS fine.

p.s Where's my fucking time-off button?! I wanna live back in the kampung days, PRONTO. Hari-hari pakai kain cap bunge kemboja pon aku tak kesah, asalkan aku boleh enjoi hidup nie in slowmo mode.